Last week, I told you about the TFS-the Total Food Score. And I told you that Jamaica Plain was a mere wannabe in the race for TFS dominance against the secret power of Cambridge. Especially the Cambridge found only via nighttime M2 request stops in the wilderness between MIT and Central, or between Central and Harvard.

For instance, a true power-hitter in the Cambridge line-up of TFS: Inman Square's Punjabi Dhaba (225 Hampshire St). It's a concept restaurant. A dhaba is a roadside diner, a truck stop for Punjabi truck drivers. You might say: But, Joe, I'm not a Punjabi truck driver! Yeah, well, you're not a lot of things. But then, most of Punjabi Dhaba's customers are not in fact Punjabi truck drivers. Feel free.

Mr. and Mrs. Punjabi Dhaba run a tight organization with a dedicated team. They don't take credit cards and they don't take nonsense. If a group of Punjabi truck drivers were to walk through the door, they'd have to order and listen carefully for their shouted-out numbers just like everyone else. Please, don't make Mr. P. Dhaba shout twice. It's not like he's rude. But when people don't listen for their numbers, he gets this look on his face like he wishes he were somewhere very far away. Then he shouts out the number again. People! Listen for your number! You're hurting this poor man. Mrs. P. Dhaba, working the register, sometimes likes to wear a bike messenger bag with "Punjabi" written in funky white-out letters along the strap; other times, she works on her laptop in the corner.

Mr. P. Dhaba would like you to have some nan (Indian bread) and a lassi (a tasty yogurt drink, and I recommend the mango lassis). Mr. P. Dhaba is all about the "upsell", like that Wrap place where they ask, "Avocado and sour cream with that?" like it was just a friendly no-cost option. (I've got a lot to say about that place. But it'll have to wait.) But Mr. P. Dhaba's upsell is spiritually valid: the nan and lassi are hecka-tasty and you really do want some if you can swing the cash.

On any Friday or Saturday night, P. Dhaba is packed and filled with the beats of Punjabi and Hindi "remix CDs"-also on sale for take-out. But I advise ordering "for here" (tip: there's also seating upstairs). Your meal comes on a metal tray with compartments for rice, the main meal, raita (yogurty stuff to stir in), very nice sweet and spicy chutney, and pieces of raw red onion. The metal tray clearly states that P. Dhaba is serious about providing the TFS and would never waste your hard-earned student loan money to replace broken plates because these plates NEVER BREAK! They are SOLID METAL, people!

I'm sure everything on the Punjabi Dhaba menu is brilliant, especially the goat masala. (Remember: Goat on the menu = good prognostic sign for TFS: a "clinical pearl" from me to you.) But I don't know for sure because I am fixated on the chicken tikka masala and the saag paneer. I have my habits, and frankly, I don't go to Punjabi Dhaba for your benefit. I go there for some me time, trying to take care of my soul which you people try to beat down and steal from me every day of my freakin' life. And yes, I already took the Healer's Art. So all I have left is Punjabi Dhaba.

Thankfully, the saag paneer-spinach and chunks of cheese-is powerful enough to Healer's Art me to next week. Especially if you order it hot. Unless you specifically ask for hot, they give you some wussy-whitey version. Well, OK, they give me some wussy-whitey version. I don't know what they would give you. It's $4.95 without the upsell. The chicken tikka masala (CTM-see my student website for a history of CTM) is a couple bucks more but powerful enough to be worth it-especially if ordered spicy. As an addendum, I should add that once I went crazy and ordered something different on the recommendation of my housemate: dal, a flavorful lentil dish. It was tasty-although a little more watery than I'm used to.

Saag paneer, dal, CTM, all eaten to a bhangra beat. That'll heal ya!